Comments on: The Best of the Tweet-a-thon

By: Alan K. Henderson

Alan K. Henderson — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 12:51:13 +0000

I’d like to rephrase my first submission, because Sarah Palin is telepathically forcing me to improve my grammar and style (dang those PTA moms):

Whenever Sarah Palin sings, mariners sailing in Alaskan waters have to stop their ears so they won’t ground their ships. The capitain of the Exxon Valdez forgot to take that precaution.

By: gungagin

gungagin — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 03:37:12 +0000

Sarah Palin is the real reason the Beatles broke up.

By: gungagin

gungagin — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 03:36:02 +0000

Sarah Palin understands the infield fly rule.
Sarah Palin knows where Jimmy Hoffa and Amelia Earheart are.
Pailn taught Brian Boitano the Triple Lux.
Palin is the REAL reason the ice caps are melting.
Steve Austin is the 6 Million Dollar Man: Sarah Palin is the 27 Million Dollar Woman.

By: coolerking

coolerking — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 18:59:13 +0000

The Alaskan oil fields are mostly comprised of Sarah Palin’s urine.

Grizzly bears are known to sit upstream and trap oncoming salmon. Sarah Palin sits upstream and traps oncoming grizzly bears.

By: coolerking

coolerking — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 18:46:20 +0000

Sarah Palin used to be Governor of California, which explains the grizzly bear on the California flag. It also explains why there are no more grizzly bears in California.

By: Catherine

Catherine — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 03:28:37 +0000

Palin and her blue ox, Babe, dug the Grand Canyon by dragging her axe behind her.

By: NY Farmer

NY Farmer — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 13:24:13 +0000

Sarah Palin and Chuck Norris could never have children, because there’s already been a Jesus.

By: furious_a

furious_a — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 21:00:26 +0000

Little Known Facts about Sarah Palin:

*Sarah Palin made Keith Olbermann cry, and then got him demoted.

*Darth Vader noticed that the Force was Strong with Sarah Palin.

*If you’re still conscious, it’s because Sarah Palin doesn’t feel like dragging you behind her snow machine.

*There are no endangered species’ in Alaska, only those animals that Sarah Palin hasn’t served to her family for dinner.

*Unlike Dirty Harry, Sarah Palin knows EXACTLY how many shots she’s fired..

*They bring a knife, Sarah Palin brings a .300 Weatherby Magnum — that’s the Alaska Way.

–furious

By: smilejack1

smilejack1 — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 19:11:43 +0000

Sarah Palin once extracted all the toothpaste from the tube without squeezing from the bottom.
Sarah Palin’s parents moved to Alaska so she could be closer to her Fortress of Solitude.
Sarah Palin can explain quarterback ratings and the Bowl Championship Series formula.
Sarah Palin’s moose stew is a deep brown color even though she never uses Kitchen Bouquet.
Sarah Palin doesn’t mind if you leave the toilet seat up.
Yes, Mr. Hendrix, Sarah Palin is experienced, and she’d like to thank you for asking.
Trig is already potty-trained, Piper bench presses 275 with immaculate technique, and Willow looks like she might just grow up to be really, really hot.
After Sarah Palin claws out the eyes of her institutionally corrupt opponents, she files her nails with cinder blocks.
Sarah Palin’s back sheds water, and she always finds Waldo.

By: Bluejay

Bluejay — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 08:37:47 +0000

Little known fact about Sarah Palin:
She doesn’t need to make Snow Angels, she is a Snow Angel

By: Alan K. Henderson

Alan K. Henderson — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 18:07:02 +0000

Sarah Palin doesn’t send a thrill up Chris Matthews’ leg - she sends a 110-volt electric shock.

By: Alan K. Henderson

Alan K. Henderson — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 17:28:22 +0000

Sarah Palin’s hunting rifle is Alaska’s missile defense shield.